Wednesday, May 03, 2006

About that

I've re-read that old post from about a year ago and have some things to say about it.

At the time I wrote:

"I feel like I'm at an important junction in my life right now where decisions have to be made. The two paths I envision are either a 'traditional' life of work and family and things, or a non-standard life of travel and experiment and rule-breaking. If I choose the latter, into which I slot Korea, I might never be able to rejoin the traditional. If I opt to be safe and return home after one year to 'find a man' and whatever else comes along with that, I might never be fulfilled. I don't know if I can choose both. There's no urgent decision to be made right now, since this one year that I am taking will hopefully provide some answers for me. But it is on my mind lately."

So as it turns out, this year has provided some answers for me. I no longer feel like this is a real decision to be made. Why did I ever think it was so black and white? I don't have to make a choice between a life of traditional things or a life of adventure. I think that if I want both I can make it happen. Truthfully speaking, though I like adventure, I'm probably more of a traditional girl at heart. A traditional girl who wants to travel and do things and to avoid getting stuck in a life with no life in it. I can make whatever I want happen as long as I don't forget about what I want.

As for this whole thing being a major determiner in my life, I think that's true but I'm not sure how important it will come to be. Maybe very. Hell, I've casually proposed studying South Korean immigration patterns for my MA studies. It's irritated my itch to see and do more, which is an irritation I don't mind keeping around as long as I can relieve it once in a while. It's made me comfortable around children, and aware that I hate to control behaviour and do not particularly excel at it either. These are important things, I'd say. I'm sure there's much more to it that I can't quite see from my smelly little apartment in Suji.

On a different note but equally important, yesterday I hurt my knee. I was playing basketball and soccer frivolously in the park and during the night I felt my knee stiffen. Now it hurts to walk, my knee doesn't want to fully extend, and I'm going to Japan for the weekened where I intend to engage in copious amounts of walking. Why oh why?!?! I do have my pockets stuffed with Yen and a detailed map to Scott's place. Painful knee of not, I'm ready for Tokyo.


At May 06, 2006 10:45 p.m. , Anonymous Anonymous said...

I often feel that way too. That there's two paths to take...adventure, excitment, danger, whatever may be. OR boring 9-5 stuck in a cubicle work. And your right, life isn't black and white and it's possible to do both, but it sure seems ike a challenge to find the job, career,path etc. which sill give ya the opportunity and cashitos to do both. Personally i feel like i need to get some of the adventure out of my system while i'm young so it'll be easier to settle down later (ie not feel like i've missed out on something). I suppose we're pretty similar in that manner.

I hope your knee is ok and that you're having a super time in Tokyo!


PS--How would you feel about me tagging along for some of your SE Asia trip? We have the same vacation times and plans pretty much and i think it would be cool to have a companion(s) on the journey. So what do ya say?


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