The Outback Bathroom Incident - unabridged

Bathrooms here in Korea are definitely worth mentioning, though I'm lucky enough to have thus far avoided any of the traditional squat toilets. I don't think people flush their toilet paper down so it often smells a little rank and I don't know how much people wash their hands so soap is sometimes hard to come by.

Last week I chuckled over a 'privacy unit' mounted on a public bathroom stall. When you press a button the unit produced a loud flushing sound so that if you let a noise or two slip nobody would be the wiser. But what is that strange, loud flushing coming from the other stall? Hmmm..

Yesterday we went to Outback to get a taste of home (AKA clogged artery inducing grease). After eating a fair share of cheesey bacon fries and fried calamari I had to take off for the bathroom. Shelly also went. Inside the stalls was not only a 'privacy' unit but a whole elaborate machine with many colourful buttons and knobs, none of which we could fully understand. We giggled about them and Shelly pushed something to the left, causing liquid to spray her in the foot. Why would anyone need to clean off their foot while sitting on the toilet? Maybe it was a foot washer? I don't know.

When I finished up I was standing in my stall pressing buttons like a kid on an elevator. The one with a picture of spray produced a scent. How lovely. The one with the picture of a sprinkler... well, can you guess what it did? Apparently I'm lacking forsight. I got a shot of water straight out of a spout in the toilet, directed right at my stomach. And it wasn't just a single shot. It continued at full force until I could reach the button again.

I hadn't laughed so hard since the taxi cab ride the night before. My shirt was soaked.

I'm just glad I had already flushed.