My ear hurts.
The ear is getting worse and I can't sleep. But not because of the ear. I know this is getting repetitive but my mind is racing with the sudden reality that I'm facing. For months the idea of Korea has been merely that; an idea. And now it is fast approaching.
Maybe I will forget the simulation. I don't really want to do it and Mrs. Rudolph told me I'd always be a quitter when I walked out of choir in grade six. If I do forget it I could be on a plane in two weeks time. Two weeks! Holy shit.
It's really not the end of the world if I forget the simulation. I still have the observations, the workshop on teaching overseas, and the six weeks of class time. Those are all very valuable experiences. And anyway, I won't be working with a population that's anywhere close to the settlement students. I'll be working with children.
Children. I don't know a damn thing about them. I don't even know if I like them. I was lying in bed wondering how in the hell I'll be able to teach them. The thought of getting into more regular exercise is also on my mind. Will I join a gym in Korea or frequent a pool? And the fact that D'Arcy won't join me for more than one full month. That's one month of being completely on my own.
Can you imagine how it will feel to sit on the airplane anticipating an entirely different life? An entirely different world?
What will I pack???
Man. I don't know how I'm going to sleep for the next few weeks. My ear hurts.
posted by Jessica @ 12:05 a.m.
4 Comments
4 Comments:
wow, you sound like a nervous wreck. i can totally understand. but, i hope you will make yourself calm down and try to enjoy everything. i am willing to bet you that it will be totally different from whatever your expectations are... as expectations tend to be rather outrageous... whether good or bad...
like my mentor said... be like water (hahaha, that was bruce lee that said that). it becomes it's environment, like a cup or a glass... so you should become an asian (hehehe).
really though, i completely understand your fear and anxiety. i think no matter what you do though, you will do well and you will be fine. this i am positive.
Start drinking heavily now. It'll make the hangovers later easier. :D
Teaching the class is the easy part. Keeping the little guys attention is not easy. It's not even possible.
I like to think of it as excitement instead of nerves. ;)
I just reread my post and your comment, Larry, and I think it comes off as though I'm much more nervous than I am. Of course I'm a bit nervous, but most of those things that I was thinking about are exciting things, not scary things.
It was an "I'm excited to go" post really.
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